Showing preference to one child over the other
Q: Is there any harm in a parent preferring one child over the other
as far as presenting them with gifts is concerned?
A: It appears in Bukhaari Shareef (vol 1, pg 352) that a sahaabi by the
name of Nu`maan bin Basheer had presented a slave to his son. His
wife insisted that she would only be pleased with him until Nabi
approved of him presenting the slave to his son.
This sahaabi went up to Nabi and related what had transpired
between him and his wife. He then requested Nabi to approve of
his gift to his son.
Nabi asked him, “Have you granted an equal amount to your other
children?” He replied in the negative. Nabi then mentioned to him,
“Fear Allah Ta`ala and implement equality amongst your children.”
A similar narration appears in Bukhaari Shareef (vol 1, pg 361) as
well, wherein Nabi stated, “Do not appoint me as a witness over
In yet another Hadeeth, Nabi is reported to have mentioned, “I will
not stand as a witness over oppression.”
From this we understand that one should be impartial among his
children. It is incorrect that one child is granted a gift and the other is
either deprived or granted lesser. This is not the estate of a deceased
person where each heir is allotted a different share.
Malfoozaat of Faqeeh-ul-Ummat