Q AND A

Q. I would like to enquire about people having khatams for deceased with regards to 3, 7 or 40 days. Is it permissible and should we attend?

A. Reciting the Qur’aan Shareef and conveying the thawaab (reward) to a deceased is a laudable and encouraged practice in Islam. However, viewing a particular date as incumbent and strictly holding khatm ceremonies on the specific dates transforms the practice into bid’ah. Furthermore, these khatm ceremonies are accompanied with other violations such as intermingling of the sexes. It is, therefore, not permissible to attend such functions. There is no need to wait for the 3rd day or 40th day for Isaal-e-Thawaab. In fact, this waiting is proof of lack of concern for the mayyit. The mayyit is in need of immediate thawaab and Du’aas. These khatm ceremonies reek of ostentation. Deeds done for show are shone of tha-waab as the purpose then is not the pleasure of Allah Ta’ala. May Allah Ta’ala save us from Bid’aat which are tantamount to claiming that the Deen is imperfect and thus the need for these concocted bid’ah customs.

 

Q. A Three Talaaqs Saga

I struck up a haraam friendship with a lecturer which resulted in us meeting and texting each other and other haraam things which I acknowledge as sinful. The relationship lasted 20 days.

My husband found out about this haraam friendship I struck up. In one breath he then said talaaq 3 times. There were no witnesses, just us.

He then confessed to being a cocaine addict and apologised for what he said. He said that he was suffering from withdrawals and wasn’t in the right frame of mind and he wants to work it out. I ended the illicit relation-ship immediately. It was only to get away from all the abuse I was suffering from my husband.

We agreed to work it out. He promised me the world and I believed him when he said that it wasn’t a valid talaaq. He said that he only suggested three talaaqs. I consulted people and they said 3 talaaqs (no matter what) is valid, regardless of the circumstances. They also said that iddat was completed even though I remained with him after the talaaq was given.

My question is: Is the talaaq valid? Is iddat complete? If he wants to change and get back with me do I need to make nikaah again and consummate this marriage and be divorced again from the other man and then sit for iddat again before I marry him? I don’t want to live in sin and want to repent for the haraam life I’ve led. Please advise.

A. The position with the Talaaq is as follows:

If your husband had in fact issued three Talaaqs as you have mentioned, then the nikaah was terminated then and there, and you have been living in adultery ever since. This ruling is on the basis of your contention that your husband had issued three talaaqs.

Your iddat had commenced and has long ago ended. However, thereafter you were in adultery with your ex-husband. Although there is no iddat now, nevertheless, if you are pregnant and should you marry another man whilst in the state of pregnancy then despite the Nikaah being valid, cohabitation will not be permissible before delivery of the child.

Since three talaaqs have been issued, you can no longer get married to your ex-husband. Only if you marry someone else and if he happens to give you Talaaq after consummation of the marriage, then you may remarry your first husband. But this process may not be arranged.

 

Q. Can you please advise me on the process that needs to be followed after giving birth?

Do we perform ghusal for the baby before adhaan? Is it okay for the father to read adhaan as well as sweeten the mouth?

Is it fine for a lady to do the shaving of the head or not?

Is there a Du’a to read upon the hair removal?

Is it okay for the father himself to do the aqeeqah? Does one give out the amount of the weight of the hair or can one give more? Who do we give it to?

 

Q. A person slandered me by claiming that I knocked (stole) his family property. I have repeatedly tried to explain that I am not guilty of this heinous crime but to no avail. Kindly advice me. What I should do?

A. The first thing that you need to do is to ensure that you are indeed not guilty of what he has accused you of. Do not trust and rely on your own judgement. You are human and you could have erred. Rather consult with a pious Aalim. If you are not guilty, then do not bother as ultimately your case would be heard in the Court of Allah Ta’aala against the person who has falsely accused you. There is no need for you to be worried.

 

Q. I am looking for a meaning and story of the following names: (1) Zayaan and (2) Zaeem

A. 1. Zayaan is a dubious name or word. We have no idea what it means. The spelling seems to be distorted.

2. Zaeem means ‘leader’ or ‘one who stands as guarantee for someone’. There are no stories behind this name which

we are aware of.