A Unique Way Of Creating Peace

Hadhrat Moulana Maseehullah Khan رحمه الله mentions this incident:

Hadhratwálà, Hadhrat Moulana Ashraf Ali Thánwí رحمة الله عليه told us a qissah:

A certain person’s wife went to a buzrug with a complaint: ” Hadhrat! My husband is causing me tremendous vexation with his scolding.” The buzrug immediately understood the situation. The husband says one thing and the wife says four things in retaliation. Her tongue never tires.

Just now we were sitting silently for quite some time and nobody spoke. You may have observed that in the home the situation when the wife does not say anything, the husband will not have anything to say. Only if she says something he will respond to her. When several men get together they are able to remain silent for long periods, but let just two women come together, then there is no room for silence! Therefore, become deaf and dumb and the argument will not progress any further.

To continue: When the wife came with her complaint (laws of pardah observed), the buzrug immediately understood the situation. He said: ” bring some water and I will recite something over it.” She passed the water to him. He mumbled something and then said (Passed the message to her): ” Take this water with you. When your husband starts saying things to you, take a gulp of the water from this bottle and sit down. Do not swallow it and do not spit it out. The arguments will cease.”

She took the water and left. Now whenever the husband became a bit harsh in his speech, she would take a gulp of the water and sit down, neither swallowing the water nor spitting it out. The husband now had nothing to respond to after a few days both the husband and the wife had stopped the arguments.

Extracted from ‘For Friends‘ Vol 1, pg 159