6 Magic Phrases Parents Use to Raise Kids Who Actually Listen

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Getting kids to listen isn’t about control—it’s about connection. According to child psychologist Reem Raouda, who has studied over 200 parent-child relationships, the secret to raising cooperative children lies in emotional safety and respectful communication.

Here are six powerful phrases that help children feel heard, supported, and more willing to cooperate:


1. “I believe you.”

When children feel doubted, their defenses go up. This phrase defuses shame and builds trust.

Example:
Child: “I didn’t spill the juice on purpose!”
Parent: “I believe you. Let’s clean it up together.”


2. “Let’s figure this out together.”

Instead of barking orders, invite your child into the problem-solving process. This reduces resistance and encourages accountability.

Example:
Parent: “I see you don’t want to clean everything now. Let’s figure this out together. What’s the first step?”


3. “You can feel this. I’m right here.”

When kids are overwhelmed, they need emotional regulation—not logic. This phrase validates their feelings and offers calm presence.

Example:
Parent: “You can feel this. I’m right here.”
(Instead of “Stop crying, you’re overreacting.”)


4. “I’m listening. Tell me what’s going on.”

Before kids can listen, they need to feel heard. This phrase opens the door to understanding and healing.

Example:
Child: “I’m never playing with my brother again!”
Parent: “I’m listening. Tell me what’s going on.”


5. “I hear you. I’m on your side.”

This phrase shifts the dynamic from conflict to collaboration, helping kids feel supported rather than opposed.

Example:
Child: “This homework is stupid!”
Parent: “I hear you. I’m on your side. Let’s find a way to make this easier.”


6. “I’ve got you, no matter what.”

Mistakes can trigger shame. This phrase reassures children that love isn’t conditional on perfection.

Example:
Parent: “I’ve got you, no matter what. We’ll make it right together.”


💬 Final Thoughts

Reem Raouda emphasizes that no single phrase can undo a pattern of yelling or threatening. But when parents consistently protect their child’s dignity, enforce boundaries with empathy, and foster emotional safety, listening becomes a natural outcome.

Want more parenting insights? Follow Reem Raouda on Instagram or check out her FOUNDATIONS guide for conscious parenting.


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References
[1] Child psychologist: Parents who raise kids who listen use 6 … – CNBC